Burn out.\u00a0 It happens.\u00a0 I can\u2019t remember it ever happening to me in the few weeks leading up to a race, but this time it did.\u00a0 Racine is 32 days away.\u00a0 And I just don\u2019t feel like training.\u00a0 I just want to sleep.\u00a0 For like a week.<\/p>\n
I got back from Ragnar last week and managed to shuffle my way through the week of post-race blues.\u00a0 I kept telling myself at least I have Racine 70.3 to look forward to in just over a month.\u00a0 But for this week, I have absolutely zero to show for my training.\u00a0 My hip has been bugging me since the relay last weekend, so I pretty much took running out of the equation for the last 10 days, with the exception of a mile and a half that I ran last Thursday with Ethan who was dragging me along the entire way, telling me to hurry up.\u00a0 I think it took me nearly 14 minutes to go 1.25 miles\u2026painfully slow.\u00a0 Literally. I hurt.<\/p>\n
I did manage to work in some laps in the pool, several miles on the bike and some strength training.\u00a0 Sunday morning I rode almost 30 miles, partially in a downpour, before heading in to work.\u00a0 But since then\u2026nothing.\u00a0 I have done absolutely zip.\u00a0 On Monday, I had to refocus my priorities to tend to things like retirement funds and taxes and life insurance and broken air conditioner units.\u00a0 All things I had been pretty much avoiding for about a month.\u00a0 Except the AC, that kinda snuck up on me, and I knew I needed to deal with it before the real St. Louis summer arrives.\u00a0 Basically, anything regarding finances is pretty much like someone speaking Japanese to me, so rather than try to understand it, I just smile and nod and go on my merry way.\u00a0 Then I ride off into the sunset thinking that if I just ignore it, I won\u2019t ever have to deal with it again. \u00a0Well, yesterday, it was time to stop avoiding things and confront them head on.\u00a0 So I did.\u00a0 But it pretty much sucked up my whole day and after a while I decided my Monday brick workout was out the window.\u00a0 And I was, oddly, ok with that.<\/p>\n
Eventually I made my way to work.\u00a0 And afterwards, we had our standing Monday night girls outing\u2026me, Linds and Katrina.\u00a0 Occasionally, one of us doesn\u2019t make it (which usually involves one of those two having plans with a boy) but last night we all ditched our plans and joined up for some 54th<\/sup> St Therapy.\u00a0 Katrina sidelined packing and prep for this weekend, Linds bailed on the new guy from \u201cmatch\u201d and I happily saved my Chinese take-out and viewing of the Bachelorette for another night.<\/p>\n Anyway, I had considered going to swimming this morning, but when I was asked to take custody of the kids a little earlier than normal, of course I couldn\u2019t refuse. \u00a0So, my swim workout again fell by the wayside.\u00a0 And again I wasn\u2019t terribly disappointed.\u00a0 Relieved is probably more accurate.<\/p>\n I tell people all the time that eventually something will come up to throw a wrench in their training.\u00a0 I had a customer the other day who insisted he wouldn\u2019t miss a training run leading up to the Chicago Marathon in Oct.\u00a0 I told him that chances were good that he would get sick or something would come up at some point to make him skip a run or even two, but he should remember it isn\u2019t the end of the world.\u00a0 Just pick up where you left off and keep on going.\u00a0 He insisted he wouldn\u2019t slip, not even once.\u00a0 Ok, dude, we\u2019ll just see about that.<\/p>\n So, why is it that after missing two of my crucial workout days, I am considering throwing in the towel?\u00a0 This isn\u2019t like me.\u00a0 I don\u2019t always practice what I preach (ie-Get on the foam roller everyday!\u2026uh, yeah, I do that\u2026usually\u2026sometimes\u2026not really) but honestly, I\u2019ve never been one to be worried after skipping a workout or two.\u00a0 However, tonight as I sat on my booty at the pool with the kids, eating a dinner consisting primarily of brownies and Swedish fish, I found myself considering the possibility that I have taken on one too many races and I am no longer finding this fun.\u00a0 Picking the hardest race I\u2019ve ever attempted, which takes place during my kids summer vacation, in the year that I am learning how to be a single parent, might possibly have been the dumbest thing I have ever done.\u00a0 \u00a0Finding time to train for this thing is STRESSING ME OUT!<\/p>\n So, what are my options\u2026consider the possibility that I should step out of this race and save 70.3 for another season in my life.\u00a0 OR\u2026remind myself that I\u2019m human, I\u2019m not Superwoman, and it\u2019s ok if I go and attempt this race and just do the best I can without placing a bunch of expectations on myself.\u00a0 It might take me a really, really, really long time to finish this thing\u2026and that\u2019s ok.\u00a0 I might get a toe cramp on the swim or a flat tire during the bike or any other number of setbacks on the course.\u00a0 I might have to walk the entire half-marathon, which would typically be my strength.\u00a0 I might, God forbid, not even finish.\u00a0 And all of those things are O-K. \u00a0I\u2019m still going to try.\u00a0 Even though my training hasn\u2019t been what I wanted it to be.\u00a0 And even though this week, I\u2019ve been in the dark place, and haven\u2019t particularly felt like training.\u00a0 I\u2019m still going to keep putting one arm in front of the other, one pedal in front of the other and one red Mizuno running shoe in front of the other, just to make the effort.\u00a0 Because that, my friends, is life.\u00a0 It\u2019s hard, and sometimes we have to do things that we don\u2019t find especially enjoyable or we aren\u2019t very good at and sometimes we just feel burned out, but ultimately, we know that we have to at least try.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t think anyone would think any less of me if I decided this wasn\u2019t the time or place for me to attempt this.\u00a0 And quite frankly, I don\u2019t really give a crap if they did think less of me.\u00a0 I don\u2019t need to prove anything to anyone other than myself.\u00a0 This is between me, myself and I.\u00a0 Nobody else.\u00a0 At the end of the day, I am accountable only to the person that I see when I look in the mirror.\u00a0 And I know that I\u2019m not the kind of person to back down from something just because I may not do it as well as I do some other things.<\/p>\n So, yeah, this week I committed the cardinal sin of training when I bailed on a couple workouts just because.\u00a0 That doesn\u2019t mean I\u2019ve lost my discipline, it just means that I\u2019m a busy single mom who had some extra challenges come up. But I won\u2019t run away with my tail between my legs. \u00a0I\u2019ll stand and fight. I\u2019ll get back on the horse and ride again.\u00a0 And I\u2019ll probably fall off a time or two, or ten.\u00a0 And I\u2019ll probably encounter some more things that I don\u2019t know how to do (I still need Roberto to teach me how to change a flat tire).\u00a0 And I\u2019ll probably ask everyone I know for advice.\u00a0 And I\u2019ll probably piss and moan about how I\u2019m just not as good at some of this as so many other people I know.\u00a0 But it is what it is.\u00a0 And at least I\u2019m gonna keep giving it a shot.\u00a0 Starting tomorrow.\u00a0 Or maybe the day after.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Burn out.\u00a0 It happens.\u00a0 I can\u2019t remember it ever happening to me in the few weeks leading up to a race, but this time it did.\u00a0 Racine is 32 days away.\u00a0 And I just don\u2019t feel like training.\u00a0 I just want to sleep.\u00a0 For like a week. I got back from Ragnar last week and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[11,9,7,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-335","post","type-post","status-publish","format-aside","hentry","category-conquering-fears","category-lessonsfromrunning","category-onbeingasingleparent","category-randomthoughts","post_format-post-format-aside"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4eO4v-5p","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=335"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":389,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335\/revisions\/389"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=335"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=335"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.ramblingrunnergirl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=335"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}